Thursday, May 27, 2010

taiwan! stop killing precious animals for your little dick!

i'm not a vegetarian. and i think every animal on this planet has a secondary function of being food for another. that is just the way life here works.
but NO ANIMAL should be killed for a stupid reason!
i called out the fire department once to take a snake away- a highly venomous, but utterly beautiful Taiwan Umbrella Krait. i watched them catch the snake,naively thinking they would relocate it. imagine my shock when i heard them talking about putting it into wine (pao jiou) to make a sex tonic.
despite the fact that they broke the law (taiwan snakes are protected species) the reason for doing it is the epitomy of stupidity.
first of all, is having a big stick the only part of pleasing a woman? a good climax is 90% emotional and good foreplay. but that information is lost on these assholes, who are too lazy and too stupid to open a book and find out what a clitoris is.
"just shove it" is their motto! i feel really sorry for taiwan women.
secondly, these "remedies" have NO SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE behind them. NONE! we know that Viagra works for most people (actually not drinking and taking a walk now and then works even better) but bear bile, snake bile, etc??
the thing is these remedies, like a LOT of things in chinese culture, WASTE TIME!
why go to all the trouble of having to hunt down an animal, kill it, stick it in wine for 6 months, when a pill can be made by modern machinery, in a clean environment in a few minutes? and that pill can be gotten from your doctor with a simple prescription!
and now people are buying "seal liver oil" Goddamn it! there are better ways to get DHA- borage oil for one. cod liver is another. lots better than clubbing a mammal to death!
and what about shark fin? our ocean ecology would be totally screwed without sharks. sharks eat up some of the fish that compete with other fishes we eat. they balance the food chain. and why are these sharks dying? because taiwan people think shark fin has some lucky meaning. precious animals have to DIE for somebody's tradition??!!
i've had it with all this traditon this and that! let's start using our brains and our hearts to take care of this planet.
that's what WE were put here for.

Sunday, May 23, 2010

first come first impression- how early arrival foriegners messed it up for all of us

one only has to look at some of the english textbooks written by foriegners in taiwan to know that somebody was pulling the wool over somebody's eyes. there was a time when any foriegner who got off the boat could make outlandish claims and get away with it. these guys managed to win the confidence of whatever bushiban they were working for and wrote generally crappy books that make my life, for one, very difficult.
in fact, one of the worst mistakes bushibans make is writing their own books. really excellent courses like "Side by Side" get thrown away and replaced by these shitty books written by somebody's favorite "lao wai".
a lot of these foriegners were/are escapees from whatever crap life they had in their own country. i call them "white trash drug addicts with language skills". they learn just enough chinese to get by and get noticed.
these foriegners also sealed into stone the idea that "all foriegners can play guitar, all foriegners are happy, etc". they plied their sappy, half-ass written songs in mandarin, convincing somebody that they ought to make a record, which of course DIDN'T sell, thereby ruining the chances of later foriegners from EVER making it in music here.
then they wrote their crappy books which flooded the market. you can't write a book now because these assholes already beat you to it. and these methods are part of the engrained learning method here. that is slowly changing thankfully.
was taiwan originally a haven for losers? it appears. luckily those days are coming to an end. you can't be just any hippie off the boat anymore. people are slowly coming around to seeing thru the "foriegn-ness" and into the fucked-up-ness. hopefully every foriegner with something to offer will be now given the chance to do so.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

AIT and its never ending parade of foriegn "experts"

i don't have an economics degree, and just barely understand how stocks work. if i were to invest, it wouldn't go much deeper than a mutual fund (fuck sitting around watching a stock screen all day- i leave that to professionals).
but i wonder why all these foriegn authors come to taiwan and say the same shit all the time:" taiwan is so unique, taiwan is so great, taiwan is so creative". it all sounds so condescending.
yes taiwan has made a niche for itself in electronics and OEM. they do that super well (having done work in that field, i'm in AWE of the taiwan electronics industry) but i personally think these assholes (the experts) are just here to plug their books.
maybe what they are talking about is above my head, but to me, saying TAIWAN and CREATIVITY in the same sentence is sort of an oxymoron. people, and especially companies, don't go out of their way to be different.
look at scooters. has there been any REAL, EARTHSHAKING re-design recently? all the scooters look a hair on an ant's leg different from each other! absolutely the same.
look at music. taiwan steals parts of western songs (not sample, STEAL) and try to hide the fact that these riffs came from another source. i have SEEN producers do this. where's the creativity? creative dishonesty? creative at following a narrowly defined idea of how a product should be?
then these "experts" step out of their field and start to comment on how taiwan should "embrace china without fear". the only persons whose opinions matter in that area are people with a military /strategic/state dept background. those are the only people who really know what China is capable of, not some Harvard MBA/bullshit bookseller.
but AIT is the prime bullshit artist of them all. just listen to their " the US relationship with Taiwan is getting better" rhetoric.
the US HAS OWNED TAIWAN SINCE 1945! there is no fucking "relationship", other than that taiwan is the unclaimed US child of WWII. a child whom they won't admit to having otherwise they'd have to issue US passports and deal with a massive influx of taiwanese immigrants. simple as that!
hopefully, they never will admit to it. cause i'd hate to move back to the US and have to live next to tai ke! nice, educated taiwanese, welcome, of course^^.
personally, i think taiwan should tell these foriegn experts to fuck off unless they can say something other than the same old, condescending dribble. these seminars are a waste of time.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

why i like lin chi ling (and why she disappoints me)

truly, in another time, she would be a queen. i like lin chi ling a lot, mostly for the way she conducts herself amidst a sea of shallow, immature television "personalities". she's smart -not just book smart- but really smart. and she's unique. i think you could cross the oceans ten times and not find another person like her, beauty aside. i'm sure if i met her at a party, she'd be the most interesting person to talk to.

i admire how almost everything that comes out of her mouth is worth hearing, at least as far as young girls are concerned. she shares her make-up and beauty/life tips, and conducts herself with class.
compare that with the mass amount of USELESS CUNTS on taiwan TV, talking about how they need a man to do this and that for them, their newest LV bag, etc, and ranting on and on about their bra size, brand of napkin, etc.
i really want to slap these bitches into reality. maybe there are lots of geek/wimps with money who would shell out everything for these women, but i would pass them up for a normal girl working at 7-11 in a second.
lin chi ling never dips down into useless bitch territory, and for that i thank her.
now for why she disappoints me:
i feel she's slowly being eroded by the people around her. and i've heard her say things that made me feel she's slipping a little. i'm not putting her down. the entertainment "industry" here is either "play ball or get left behind". but i hope she can keep up the high standards she has shown so far.
personally, i think she's lonely as hell. if there ever was a "poor little rich girl", she's it. she worked hard, reached the top of her game, only to be surrounded by airheads. everybody around her wants something.
Chi ling, keep up the good work. you're my hero, girl!

Monday, May 3, 2010

Yip Man for the simple minded/ geek-fu

i refuse to ever tell ANY taiwanese person that i have studied martial arts. the reason being is, they will brand me a "typical foriegner/likes kung fu". so that makes taiwanese learns to play tennis what then? a freak?
then i get the statement, "you like kung fu", same as they say about my doing music "you like music".
actually if you only do something because you like it, you're on a very childish level of living. there comes a point where you do something long enough, and "like" is not part of the equation. love it or hate it you DO IT, because it has become a part of your life.
that's why i hate the wave of yip man/wing chun geeks. not to make myself mr. know it all, but i KNEW WHO YIP MAN WAS 30 YEARS AGO! wing chun wasn't the source of a blockbuster movie back then. i had to research Blackbelt Magazine to find out about it. then i sent off for a book. then i searched out people here and there to show me something of it. i waited this long before i found a good teacher.
now this fucking movie comes along and it's sequel,and wing chun is the thing to do. and people think i'm one of these geeks who saw Yip man( the movie) and got all hot and excited and wanted to learn.
taiwan is full of geeks. guitar geeks, who learn from TAB, can play "better" than somebody who went to music school. and nobody knows the difference.
lets all learn!! thereby making somethng that WAS a serious study become nothing- an activity for the masses.
i'm not saying only musicians should learn to play guitar. i think everybody should learn an instrument. but these TAB books are teachig PRO LEVEL playing without PRO LEVEL KNOWLEDGE, UNDERSTANDING, OR REGARD FOR TALENT. professional skills SHOULD NOT be learned by everyone. but there are even magic schools teaching what should be a secret to ANYBODY! and who will want to watch tricks now that they already know the secret?
but back to kung fu. i was asked yesterday "you like kung fu, that's why you're doing it". i could see from his face that he felt i was a typical foriegner.
so i let loose with this one" unfortunately wing chun doesn't work that well in real combat. a lot of chinese kung fu is actually worthless in a real situation." i could see his face change. first he thinks i'm silly for wanting to learn kung fu, then he's angry because i diss kung fu. i went on, "look at K1, UFC, MMA, nobody who has ever tried chinese kung fu has lasted more than 10 seconds", to which someone piped up, "well kung fu is for health".i answered "but they say it's for fighting. then when they lose they say it's for health".
maybe i was being an asshole. but i wasn't going to let somebody belittle my years of investigation and serious study as a passing fancy,following the latest fad, or worse, as the interests of a "typical stupid foriegner".
i'd rather say FUCK KUNG FU than let anybody peg me into a convenient little hole.

can't win either way.
so when people ask me, i just tell them that kung fu sucks. it's inferior to western boxing and wrestling.
which isn't exactly true ,but this way, i keep the sincere love i have for chinese martial arts a secret, and nobody can belittle my love.